Paging Dr. Love!

This Penis Chart will give the inside line on Who has What in those O.R. scrubs!
Me and my sources have lent many a ear to eavesdrop all this cool gossip on The Long & Short of 'St. Elsewhere' Cocks!
Disclaimer: I, Rubin Farr, will not be held accountable for any misinformation reported here. If you hook up with any of these men (and may God have mercy on your mortal soul if you do...) and they don't live up to expectations, do not blame me (and don't be surprised...)! What's big to one girl is small to another (though all agree that Howie Mandel is very small...), and vice versa. This is a basic guideline of what you can possibly expect if you are unfortunate enough to be confronted by any of these men and their penises. Circumstances may vary from girl to girl. I don't want any of my girls being misled. So if you find a report you disagree with, let me know! :)

Ed Flanders / Dr. Donald Westphall
A recent email said Dr. Westphall is the archetypal 'father figure'...and is a quick shooter. His Westphallic 'father figure' is apparently very large, but he will probably not use it on you -- he will just get into bed with you and sigh a lot (and perhaps even talk wistfully about his autistic son Tommy).
Note: Seeing as Ed Flanders died years ago, it is probably best that you not try to have sex with him.
Ed Begley, Jr. / Dr. Victor Erlich
Victor has an eight inch cock, he's loud and practically rabid for eating pussy and rimming. He loves having his balls sucked, is a great kisser, and enjoys his encounters in odd/semi-public places (like the janitor's closet, eh, Lucy?!). Has a huge sexual appetite and is very loud/likes to talk dirty (which is odd to listen to because of his lisp). However, he will talk endlessly about Dr. Craig and (consequently) sometimes his cock won't stay fully hard. He tries to come off as such a sincere, sweet guy, but he's a HUGE slut. Watch out for this one, though -- even though he's a heart surgeon, he's unclean!! Either he doesn't wash the crotch area often or he has a serious problem...smells very dirty. Gross!!
Howie Mandel / Dr. Wayne Fiscuss
No surprise here, he is very small . Reports are Fiscuss is a bit over four inches!! There are also rumors that Fiscuss likes to "make it" in weird places, such as the morgue (just ask Kathy Martin!!).

Terrence Knox / Dr. Peter White
Sort of a rough one (he once tied a woman up in her car with her seatbelt!!), White insists on wearing a ski mask while fucking. He likes it when girls "act scared" and is also into elderly women. And of course he has a small dick!! Would someone be into such weird shit otherwise??

David Morse / Dr. Jack Morrison
Average-sized cock and a lot of baggage... I guess being anally-raped makes a guy a bit, shall we say, "timid" when it comes to sex -- expect a night of cuddling instead.

Denzel Washington/ Dr. Phillip Chandler
You know what they say about black men...

Norman Lloyd / Dr. Daniel Auschlander
Will tell you he's married but still pursue you. If you play with his dirty onion ring, he'll worship you. Average all-around; shows respect, and doesn't seem to be TOO much the player. Likes 'em young.

William Daniels / Dr. Mark Craig
The voice of TV's Night Rider!! He's also the premiere heart surgeon in Boston, and he'll never let anyone forget it for even a single second (I guess that's cos he's got such a tiny dick). Has a tendency to say, "Oh, for crying out loud!" when cumming (and let's just say that you won't have to wait long to hear him say it either...).
Nurse Shirley Daniels
Not a man, does not have a cock.

Stephen Furst / Dr. Elliott Axelrod
Back in the day Elliott was a huge slut, but he's chilled out a little. If you blow him, he'll ask if you'll swallow. If you don't, he's nice enough to respect that, but he'll wanna cum on your tits. He's also into a little ass-play. You wanna try a dildo out on him? Go ahead and ask. He'll say yes!

This list will be continually updated. If you have an update on a name or a new name to add to the list, please let me know! And thanks to all of you who have made this a throbbing suckcess (Get it?! Tee hee!)!

Lustfully Yours,
Rubin Farr & his friends